A Thought a Day. (sometimes with photos masking as thoughts)

Daily Dreams: Dragon.

2010-06-19T11:24:00.003-04:00

Last night, at a chalet-like event held in a school ground (like NJC), each participant has a dragon. The breed and colour of the dragon is determined by the group one is in.

Mine looks like a pink Scorchio. As in Neopets.

I can't remember its name so I kind of abandoned it.

The smaller ones are more ferocious.

I end up in some singing (CNY songs) competition which becomes an eating competition which fails.

Two previous nights ago, it was 花木兰, 倚天屠龙记, and 还珠格格 inspired scenario in a school setting.

To blog in greater detail will be taxing.

Banal Life: Mua Chee.

2010-06-13T09:46:00.003-04:00

Finally. Great great tau hway and you tiao. Photo: Sandra Go.

Today, I panicked a little-spiked heart rate and all.

I have been thinking about Mua Chee for at least half the week, frequently painfully turning away from it right when I could see it.

Finally resolved to walk into a pasar malam-like thingy (it's in the day so..)

COULD NOT FIND MUA CHEE the first time I walked through it!!!

Almost squealed from disbelief.

Found it in the end.

Underwhelming Mua Chee.

Genevieve Says.

2010-06-09T11:24:00.003-04:00

Gen Thong says,

'You can be lumpy but you can't be stumpy. Stumpy is middle-aged.' - On legs

'If you can live with your parents, you can live with anyone.' - On harmonious domestic life

Daily Musings: Follow your Dreams!

2010-06-04T06:17:00.002-04:00

Great advice but... I feel that it's so unfair for those who want to be... accountants.

I am following my dreams to become an artist!

Great cool!

My passion is for accountancy! I am following my dreams! Respect me for it!

Uh. Perhaps respect but never awe-inspiring.

Sian.

It seems that attractive and 'dream-like' require our aspirations to be slightly.. Dangerous?

Whimsies: Birthday Lecture.

2010-06-02T10:54:00.001-04:00

On my 21st birthday, I can possibly hire a guest lecturer, preferably a Sociologist, and invite party guests to sit through a most invigorating and awe-ing lecture.

I squeal from excitement just contemplating my genius idea.

Whimsies: Bacteria-Love.

2010-05-31T02:53:00.001-04:00

Extracted from the email sent 19th April.

This email was initially (before I fell sick) going to be titled 'The Most Romantic Gesture' 'cause on Thursday night, while having after-dinner drinks with my friends (meaning I had water and my friends had coffee), I thought of a most most romantic thing to do. The gesture is to culture bacteria (which we were discussing) for someone!

Maybe some of you are kind of incredulous so I am going to explain it step by step.

We were talking about culturing bacteria (gosh is that all we can talk about over coffee?) and how difficult it is. We even went into the intricacies of how not to break the jelly/whatever that thingy is and the skills involved. This part of the conversation followed the part about the best gift we have ever received/given.

The Gift: screw the zig-zag pattern and draw tiny hearts or write a message. Get the person to help you look after the culture for a while and a week later (is it a week?) he or she will be able to read the message! This at once has a surprise component, exhibition of skills, and is just marvelously romantic. haha. I am serious by the way. If I am someone who belongs to a lab.

I AM MARVELOUSLY INGENIOUS.

Life-ish Edicts: Romance Novels.

2010-05-20T13:01:00.006-04:00

Never read a contemporary Romance novel with no handphones in it and never read a historical Romance in which characters wear wigs.

Oh and of course SOMEONE has to be rich and preferably titled in the historical; if I want to read about the poor, I would read Dickens.

Life-ish Edicts are rules I live by, only rarely occasionally breaking them.

Deathly Whimsies: Ripped by Wind.

2010-05-19T16:46:00.002-04:00

I pry open the aircraft window with a Bic pen & I get sucked out by the wind going faster and faster till my skin is travelling faster than my organs. Lightning illuminates my stretched features. Into the twisted air.

More likely, I freeze to death.

Written: Flight from NYC to Portland, Oregon. Lightning and thunder. How death could come to me.

Whimsies: Black as Moonless Night.

2010-05-16T00:14:00.002-04:00

"You managed it yesterday. And give me some more coffee. Black as midnight on a moonless night."

Harga looked surprised. That wasn't like Vimes.

"How black's that, then?" he said.

"Oh, pretty damn black, I should think."

"Not necessarily."

"What?"

"You get more stars on a moonless night. Stands to reason. They show up more. It can be quite bright on a moonless night."

Vimes sighed.

"An overcast moonless night?" he said.

Harga looked carefully at his coffee pot.

"Cumulus or cirro-nimbus?"

"I'm sorry? What did you say?"

"You get city lights reflected off cumulus, because it's low lying, see. Mind you, you can get high-altitude scatter off the ice-crystals in--"

"A moonless night," said Vimes, in a hollow voice, "that is as black as that coffee."

"Right!"

-- Men at Arms, Terry Pratchett

Daily Dreams: Graded Expedition.

2010-05-05T10:56:00.002-04:00

Dreams from last night should have nightmarish qualities to them.

There involved being stabbed, capture by tribal group (like with a NET thrown at a group of us), having to take placement tests (we got captured to take a placement test)...

But the first dream was not too bad.

I am on a 3-day expedition and it is 30% of my Science grade.

On the second day, we have to meet up with a known criminal who will drive us halfway up a mountain and once halfway up, we are in Yilan (as in the place in Taiwan).

We will have to wake up at dawn the next morning (on day 3) and we are advised not to overpack since towels will be provided at the little hut.

It is now day 1 and we climb up a sand dune only to step on microscopic crabs that have infiltrated my shoes onto my socks. Ouch.

Down the sand dune, I take off my shoes only to find a giant black ant (not dream-ishly giant but the size of a normal giant black ant).

Tata.

Whimsies: Alice should be in Wonderland.

2010-05-04T23:46:00.002-04:00

Lake Tahoe. Winter Break.

When Alice in Wonderland first came out, I watched it alone in the cinema nearby.

Alice should be in Wonderland.

I tear thinking of Alice not living happily ever after in Wonderland.

Movies and stories and narratives should never end this way.

It hurts my heart. Literally.

Yet, it must be so or it would be too fairy-tale like.

Not realistic enough ya?

The Irony.

Oh, I know that if it does not end the way it does it would not be as heart-wrenching and we pay to have our emotions evoked.

Daily Dreams: Thai-Korean Conflict.

2010-05-03T18:37:00.002-04:00

A friend (a generalised figure) tells me, 'I hope to work in HDB because I want to be at the heart of the Thai-Korean Conflict.'

I said, 'Huh? You mean go into Thailand and Korea to help rebuild public housing?... You do know that you should be going to work for the MFA? Unless you mean making sure Singapore's public housing accommodates the Thai-Korean Conflict by mitigating the effects in our neighbourhoods.'

And the 1-minute pre-dream (about to fall asleep but acutely aware that I am not fully asleep) ends in satisfaction that I displayed knowledge.

Awake, I ask, 'what conflict?'

Daily Musings: Anticipation.

2010-05-02T03:12:00.002-04:00

Because I have not blogged for so long (especially non-dream stuff), I have decided to come up with a Thought.

There are goals in life, mahjong sessions to go to, exams to dread, a better future, weight to lose, things to buy...

Is life made up of anticipation?

Do we feel that without anticipation our lives can end right here in the present? (Then survival dictates anticipation.)

That is certainly one perspective.

Daily Dreams: Trojan Death.

2010-04-23T11:17:00.002-04:00

I had a most realistic dream with an unrealistic plot.

I was in bed the whole time reading a book with a most fantastical plot. Yet in turning the pages, it was like viewing a movie.

The last scene of the book/movie is like an Epilogue.

The mother of the protagonist poses as Mona Lisa and the caption/narration goes something like 'After the creation of 'Trojan Death', she lives in luxury.'

Slowly, the eye/camera zooms into the painting and upwards...

And then I understand.

'Trojan Death' refers to the hair fasteners on her hair. These tiny silver thingys are arranged in a net-like structure with each overlapping diagonally with another. Like many little crosses.

In my dream it made lots of sense and seems VERY SMART that of course this will cause death of all potential persons who try to play with the hair.

The act of removing all that fasteners causes 'Trojan Death'-torturous.

Now awake, I think that arrangement of hair fasteners may just be how I am subconsciously representing the arrangement of neurons in the brain.

Daily Dreams: War & Disaster.

2010-04-08T11:33:00.002-04:00

A most convoluted dream.

I shall give you a snapshot.

New Orleans 1940s but it is really like Singapore in olden days and with a little of modern day mixed in.

Dad speaks at House of the Lords ('cause of the historical romance I just read probably) and he is contemplating moving to California 'cause while he represents New Orleans he talks all about California.

Suddenly it is a warzone (like how I imagined WWII Singapore to be).

My mom decides to board a BUS to go to Singapore (in my dream New Orleans and Singapore is like.. a few hours bus ride away).

While on the street waiting for the bus to arrive, panoramic view of the distant snow mountains all erupting. The lava flows outwards and curiously the stream coming towards us kind of freezes before it reaches us.

My mom boards the bus. I am now all alone stuck in some disaster zone (not sure about dad). I arrive at a coffee shop (not American coffee shop but Singapore coffee shop). People are having breakfast.

All I can think about is whether I should complete my lab report for Brain & Behaviour class 'cause it is due later today.

As I walk home from the coffee shop (to take my lab book), I think about it.

Daily Dreams: Schools Aggregated.

2010-04-05T10:10:00.002-04:00

Almost every night, I dream of schools.

Last night was most amazing and pure genius of my subconscious, combining ALL school experiences I have ever had (excluding the extra classes and kindergarten actually.. so maybe not PURE inborn genius but more of... if you work hard enough you get results kind of genius)

The setting is a SNGS Primary setting.

I am a teaching aid focusing on ESL students (English as Second Language). These kids incidentally are who I interact with every Friday afternoon for volunteer work down in East Broadway (Chinatown).

I subconsciously wore my SNGS uniform in the morning (as in there is a scene in which I look down shocked to see myself in the uniform)

I start to panic 'cause if I am in uniform, I should have my name tag and my hair should be neatly tied up when I go for assembly.

One of my students is wearing MY name tag upside down. I retrieve my name tag and put it on.

I need now a hair tie (I have only a lousy one)... and the bell rings (5 min before assembly begins).

Curiously, one of my primary school friends is in the classroom (but older like me) and I borrow a hair tie off her.

And NJC friends are in the classroom as well. Notably, Gim Lim (now I keep wondering what he is wearing but in my awake mind I imagine for integrity of the scene SNGS uniform)

He is talking to Jamie and says something about me 'Ms Ting told me [Gim Lim] that Peixin showed me the way in Math.' (huh?!?!?! but really something like that.) He says it very indignantly.

And someone asks why I look so worried and I reply,

'My WTE [Writing the Essay-NYU module] is due in an hour's time [actually 1.5 hours 'cause it is in my dream 8.35am] and I haven't printed it... [and in my consciousness in my dream I start to plot my route from the field where we are having our assembly [SNGS] to BUZZ [in NJC] to print my essay [NYU] all the while not neglecting the kids I am supposed to be teaching[volunteer work]]'

Incidentally, the discipline mistresses from SNGS and NJC (whom I do not meet in the dream) are envisioned to combine into one.

Monstrous right?

Whimsies: 活。

2010-04-04T22:41:00.003-04:00

Mayday DNA World Tour

Mohegan Sun Arena, CT

Daily Dreams: Clay City.

2010-04-01T20:01:00.002-04:00

We (unknown 'we') drive from one end of the city to the other.

Cross the halfway mark, we become the only colourful things around (our car's blue).

All around, the city is half-built.

All made of clay.

The architecture is what I imagine to be splendidly Ancient Greece.

Lots of pavilions.

I had wanted to say that the landscape is one of a theme park.

But it really is more eerily of a carnival.

Across the final bridge, we reach the end.

In the waters, there is a stone structure on which there is brown weed.

Daily Dreams: A Most Treacherous Competition.

2010-03-31T10:06:00.002-04:00

There is a competition invovling getting from one place to another.

Like getting from the TC classrooms in NJC (the IP classrooms we used) to the first floor, to some slope-ish area.

Our group leaves happily on our skateboards only to realise that the other group has sabotaged the equipment.

We find out only because I fall (then again I can't skateboard so I guess...)

Because the competition is in NJC, we decide to use that to our advantage.

The other group has bicycles.

At one point, we hide in the male toilet on the first floor.

There is some acrobatics involved like jumping at people through windows.

We are all in SNGS uniforms (and indeed are all from SNGS).

We win but only through treachery.

The whole time, the NJC setting is but a vague abstract concept as settings tend to be in my dreams. They morph and change as I move through, almost like moving through the blackout areas in a map.

That is one of the dreams I had last night.

In another, I live in Victorian England and it is set within a series of books I have really read.

I have to go out to sea (a 9-month one-way journey) and then back to report on a pirate situation. Like the pirates have surrounded a big big ship with tiny boats and we know about it and I have to go out 'cause I am a great sailor.

This is funny 'cause I don't know how we will know 'there is a ship about to sink in the ocean! we have to save it! but we have to know the situation first!' (exact words almost) Isn't that too slow? And how did we know in the first place?

Much of the dream involves fighting the storms in my little sailboat.

(And the pirates have the big ship watched by three small sampans with... 5-6 people per boat?)

More events happen but I have yet to decipher them.

But I get home safely.

(But the home I get back to seems way to modern for Victorian England since I use a toilet and there even is a sink with toothbrushes I believe.)

Daily Dreams: Undercover Bridesmaid.

2010-03-30T23:11:00.002-04:00

I sleep so much now because I am fascinated with my vivid dreams (REM sleep my professor said in lecture today).

In a recent one, I am a hired bridesmaid for a wedding to be held on a field (like the SNGS one).

I have to further hire another 20 females for I actually head an operation against ghosts from another evil dimensions (and only special people like us can see them).

To my horror, someone supposed to be good turns out to be bad and the groom gets kidnapped, chained to some wire framed bed in some desolate room.

Many other things happen.

Like one of those first-person shooting games (ridiculous imagery since I don't play any such games yet this is so in my dream).

The landscape is most illusory and morphs as I move through it.

Of course, I am in a pretty dress but the most most irritating aspect is the lack of a mirror in the dream.

There is a HDB flat unit involved.

Daily Musings: Book End.

2010-03-27T11:48:00.003-04:00

I have never really been able to finish reading non-fiction books.

But it took me only 2-3 nights to finish reading Outliers.

Prior to that, or concurrently, I have left Wolf Totem (which is semi-fiction) half-read and I started on this in January I believe, and The Presentation of Self in Everyday Life (which is classic Sociology text) half-read (this I reasoned I must read when I am very awake because it's a classic and important).

And prior to all of these, I have given up on many non-fiction books.

AND 'literary' fiction books as well.

(I was re-reading Lord of the Flies last week but gave up.)

Maybe it's not me but the books and the writers.

They just don't interest me.

I am not losing my ability to read wholly (since I did finish Outliers).

I used to wonder if I lack the focus and determination to read stuff to the end.

It's time to change my perspective: to stop reading halfway is not to give up but to acknowledge that I am not interested and it's then time to find another book to start on.

I am not giving up on these books though. I shall wait for when I am ready to be interested in them to start all over again.

Then again.. Outliers is kind of popular non-fiction... I am perhaps the product of this time, and extremely median in liking popular stuff.

Daily Musings: Weather.

2010-03-24T16:59:00.003-04:00

On first days of school (I mean in Singapore as in January 2nd/3rd), it always rains and latecomers are forgiven.

It is not that it always rains on the first day of school but that school starts right in the midst of the monsoon.

It is not that it rains on the first day of school after Spring Break but that when Spring Break ends Spring truly begins.

It is not that there is always dirty snow to wade through during finals in Fall but that finals during the Fall semester falls in December.

It is not that the wind blows so cold today but that I am dressed in what the window displays tell me is Spring clothes.

Alas.

Daily Dreams: American Gangster.

2010-03-20T18:56:00.003-04:00

I have been dreaming a lot recently.

Very vivid and drama-like scenarios.

All too complex to recount in whole and with accuracy.

In last night's dream, there is a Christmas tree ornament design competition.

There is a team led by this senior of my from NJCSC and they were meeting in this armoury high up in the mountains.

I was outside with this friend of the senior (but this person I can't name as in it doesn't seem to be anyone I really know in my life).

I eavesdropped on the meeting and the leader was scolding this guy who just gave a ppt presentation on the designs he was supposed to have thought up of.

The theme was 'American Gangster'.

I thought he was being really harsh and said something like 'it's really difficult! Stop yelling at him!'

And he replied something like... 'just have a laptop design!' (okay it's not laptop I think but something similar; I can't remember...)

... for I replied 'That is not American Gangster style! That's Infocomm style!!!'

Sometime later, I agreed to go for dinner with that friend of senior at this restaurant on the way down the mountain.

It served Thai food. We met his two other friends (whom I don't identify with anyone I really know).

Then suddenly it was a big group buffet dinner thing. Still Thai food.

I contemplated getting a slice of purple Swiss roll cake (with glitter?) for dessert.

Life's Laments: Diary.

2010-03-20T18:53:00.002-04:00

I have not written in my diary for two years yet I think of it always.

I think I have not given myself/allowed myself/forced upon myself time enough to think.

To really think about my life and myself.

Now I have two years of life to think about and reflect upon.

All the more reason to not start writing in my diary.

That's just too much to handle.

Daily Musings: Result Day.

2010-03-05T22:59:00.004-05:00

I can imagine that for some people an achievement today proves their worthiness for past accolades and for some others an achievement today is evidence that they would have earned what is to come and yet for some others this is irrelevant.

Trivial Question: Late.

2010-03-02T22:48:00.004-05:00

Mis-read/mis-remembered the time or just late?

I wonder which is better for personal image...

To be careless or to be bad at planning/have no intention of being on time?

Daily Musings: Where.

2010-03-01T23:29:00.003-05:00

Lake Tahoe. December 2009.

I wonder where I would arrive at if I do just what has to be done and nothing more.

And I say this because I seem to be able these days to do exactly what I set out to do each day meaning I do not expect much of myself or that I am efficient or something else.

Daily Musings: The Tragedy of Predictability.

2010-02-28T19:23:00.003-05:00

Alas, bringing a straw bag did not make the day summer.

Consistency, while admirable, can possibly make even the most amazing act expected while the occasional surprise makes the same act appreciated.

Daily Musings: Doors.

2010-02-27T20:38:00.005-05:00

Entrances/Exits. Met Museum.

I took a nap and dreamed.

I dreamed of places with one entrance but many exits.

I think that must be life.

Perhaps there are even mazes in there we must navigate.

The dream in its entirety is really quite surreal as have been many of my dreams recently.

p.s. it really is true of most buildings surely that there are more exits than entrances what with all the emergency exits.

Whimsies: Trodding.

2010-02-11T15:02:00.001-05:00

Trod where no one has trodden and you sink.

Post snow storm.

- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

Whimsies: 知足.

2010-02-10T23:13:00.003-05:00

Singapore River. 2007.

"怎么去拥有一道彩虹

怎么去拥抱一夏天的风

天上的星星笑地上的人

总是不能懂不能知道足够

如果我爱上你的笑容

要怎么收藏要怎么拥有

如果你快乐不是为我

会不会放手其实才是拥有

当一阵风吹来风筝飞上天空

为了你而祈祷而祝福而感动

终于你身影消失在人海尽头

才发现笑着哭最痛

那天你和我那个山丘

那样的唱着那一年的歌

那样的回忆那么足够

足够我天天都品尝着寂寞

知足的快乐叫我忍受心痛

知足的快乐叫我忍受寂寞"

-- 知足, 五月天

Whimsies: 爱新世纪.

2010-02-09T21:37:00.002-05:00

Singapore. 2007, August. Singapore River.

"这绚烂新世纪　深情已不受欢迎

爱你那么用力　却好像一场闹剧"

-- 嘿!我要走了, 五月天

Whimsies: 勇敢原谅.

2010-02-07T23:15:00.003-05:00

Geelong, Australia. 2007.

'对爱恨欣赏直来直往

有一种勇敢叫做原谅

在回家的路上想一想

爱如果变难堪就要放

感情的事没有标准的答案

但欠人家的你一定就得还'

-- 直来直往

It's CNY and Valentine's Day week. Chinese lyrics about love all week?

(I am just a lazy blogger. But it took me 30min to decide on the above picture and this is the last resort--a picture unrelated totally so.)

Daily Musings: Easy.

2010-02-05T22:01:00.003-05:00

Road Trip 101. Dec 2009.

To be able to provide a simple answer with no doubt is a definite show of confidence and grasp of the subject matter.

Daily Musings: Eye Contact.

2010-02-03T17:56:00.002-05:00

Sometime last December.

To make eye contact requires courage which we often do not have or sincerity we often do not want to fake.

Daily Musings: Nothing else to say.

2010-02-02T20:10:00.003-05:00

One long ago night.

When we are not interested in each other lives will we one day run out of things to say?

okay common interest in other people's lives work as well.

Whimsies: Hot Boy.

2010-01-31T22:42:00.002-05:00

Today.

Daily Musings: Consistency.

2010-01-29T01:26:00.003-05:00

Crooked-est street. San Francisco. Taken from Coit Tower.

Consistency either tells us we are not just lucky or that we really are lucky.

That's why we value it.

If you haven't noticed, I took an exactly 14-day, 2-week, break from blogging.

Back.

2010-01-15T20:13:00.001-05:00

- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

Whimsies: Feeling 2010.

2010-01-11T23:01:00.001-05:00

Portland, Oregon.

Walking 'round downtown today I realised that I'm feeling 2010 in my bones. I am convinced my joints are sending me internal messages of overusage and age.

- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

Whimsies: 希望的曙光！

2010-01-08T01:01:00.003-05:00

"回想著理想稀薄的希望
走著钢索我的刚强
伟大和伪装灰尘或辉煌
那是一线之隔或是一线曙光"

-- 我心中尚未崩坏的地方, 五月天

我的希望与坚持！

Manifested in the act of securing premium MAYDAY concert tickets despite not being able to go down personally to get them and despite that being the only way to get them (no internet or phone purchases). Called TWICE and sounded really sincere and 'no pressure but really you can't reserve the tickets for me?' And I got a return call offering just that!!!!! WOW! YAY!

And all they know about me is that I am 林小姐 despite my offer to provide my full name.

Daily Musings: Disappointment.

2010-01-06T02:26:00.002-05:00

San Francisco. On way to Alcatraz.

Disappointment implies expectations.

Whimsies: Doughnut.

2010-01-05T00:29:00.001-05:00

Voodoo Doughnut. Portland, Oregon.

The Magic is in the Hole.

Mayhaps the world viewed through the Hole in the Doughnut is a magical and colourful one.

Daily Musings: Resolute 2010.

2010-01-04T01:32:00.003-05:00

Coastal redwoods. Tallest trees. 200 years is child-ish and above 2000 years is expected lifespan. Lives even through multiple burnings.

Rationalised desire not a new year will make me resolute.

Whimsies: Eagles and Horses.

2010-01-01T11:47:00.003-05:00

Yesterday.

Eagles and Horses

John Denver

Horses are creatures who worship the earth

As they gallop on feet of ivory

Constrained by the wonder of dying and birth

The horses still run, they are free

My body is merely the shell of my soul

But the flesh must be given it’s due

Like a pony that carries it’s rider back home

Like an old friend that’s tried and been true

I had a vision of eagles and horses

High on a ridge in a race with the wind

Going higher and higher and faster and faster

On eagles and horses I’m flying again

Eagles inhabit the heavenly heights

They know neither limit nor bound

They’re the guardian angels of darkness and light

They see all and hear every sound

My spirit will never be broken or caught

For the soul is a free-flowing thing

Like an eagle that needs neither comfort nor thought

To rise up on glorious wings

Current earworm.

Daily Musings: 不會遺憾就OK了.

2009-12-31T20:19:00.001-05:00

2010.

老了。

"青春是手牽手坐上了永不回頭的火車
總有一天我們都老了不會遺憾就OK了"

- 笑忘歌, 五月天

Whimsies: Pixie!

2009-12-31T00:17:00.002-05:00

Today. Emerald Bay lookout, Lake Tahoe.

Pixie colours against white.

No Santa Claus.

Whimsies: Point an Angel.

2009-12-29T23:13:00.000-05:00

Today.

Attempting to find something to blog about I propose that the pointy tree wants us to notice the cloudy angel.

Whimsies: Clovers.

2009-12-28T22:38:00.003-05:00

Yesterday. Redwoods.

If one finds a four-leaf clover, one should have used up any luck ration in that act and would thus become later on unlucky.

(and then we find out that those clover-lookalikes we saw all around the redwood forests are not clovers but clover-lookalike beings that grow only where redwoods are.)

Daily Musings: 总会有一天.

2009-12-27T23:53:00.005-05:00

Today.

“我如果有梦有没有错

错过才会更加明白

明白坚持是什么

我如果有梦梦有多疯

够疯才能变成英雄

总会有一天有我的传说”

-- 五月天，《咸鱼》

At crossroads, this song causes tears.

FULL LYRICS! 'cause I love love this song and the hokkien version as well but Chinese is more text-friendly.

我是一只咸鱼不想承认也不能否认
不要同情我的笨又夸我天真
还梦想着翻身
咸鱼就算翻身还是只咸鱼
输的也诚恳
至少到最后我还有咸鱼不腐烂的自尊

我没有任何天分我只有梦的天真
我是傻我是蠢我将证明用我的一生
我如果有梦有没有错
错过才会更加明白
明白坚持是什么
我如果有梦梦有多疯
够疯才能变成英雄
总会有一天有我的传说

我不好也不坏不特别出众
我只是敢不通 我的人生就是一错在错
错完在重头也许放弃掉一些活得更轻松
我却不在是我我不愿意一生晒太阳吹风
咸鱼也要有梦

Daily Musings: Expectations.

2009-12-26T23:21:00.003-05:00

One of my favourite shots from yesterday. =)

Expectations are the norm and non-expectations self-delusion AND unexpected stuff merely expectations with no foresight.

Whimsies: WelcoME.

2009-12-25T22:29:00.000-05:00

Christmas stocking, presents, and a bed. :)

- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

Whimsies: Brand China.

2009-12-25T11:55:00.000-05:00

Newark Airport.

- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

Whimsies: Urban White.

2009-12-23T20:59:00.002-05:00

Today. Union Square. Rare bit of Urban White.

Daily Musings: Helping Hand.

2009-12-22T21:38:00.001-05:00

ISL. Vietnam. 2007.

Reaching out to only comes after reaching out for.

Whimsies: Off-white Snow

2009-12-22T01:13:00.000-05:00

Ugly dirty Snow (off)White.

No urban fairytales, only myths of snow white skin and pristine innocence.

- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

Whimsies: Pokemon.

2009-12-20T12:08:00.000-05:00

Friday's Christmas party at PS2.

- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

Whimsies: Polar Bear.

2009-12-17T23:02:00.004-05:00

Today. (the yellow cab is deliberate in composition to show that this is NYC)

28.4 Fahrenheit. The Fahrenheit scale surely is to make us feel better about being out in the cold.

Compared to -2 degrees Celsius?

Ice cracked hole-like but not polar bear.

Whimsies: Fiery Christmas Chill.

2009-12-14T18:29:00.000-05:00

Today.

Banal Life: Work.

2009-12-12T20:49:00.001-05:00

Chinatown.

劳。

Whimsies: Rainbow Geek.

2009-12-10T23:39:00.000-05:00

Today. Geek Squad.

Daily Musings: Last of One's Kind?

2009-12-09T23:46:00.002-05:00

NJC Prom 2008. Who took this?

Happy Birthday, SEAH GIM LIM!

What if you are the last of your kind and you are a misrepresentation?

In this case, what if this picture is the last one left of Gim Lim?

I was really thinking about this issue with great implications during Language & Society class (on Monday). People who try to reconstruct an endangered language do so by interviewing and working with the few speakers left of the language. What if these were the people who did not pay attention in grammar classes or speak a cool slang version of it?

What happens?

Does it matter?

Our world will be misinformed.

But so what?

Banal Life: 10 hours.

2009-12-08T23:37:00.000-05:00

10 hours spent at Bobst Library today. 4th Floor.

Whimsies: Bubble Tea.

2009-12-06T22:26:00.002-05:00

First time at East Broadway with Shuan and Shinq.

Bubble tea (which I don't ever drink) seems to be some cult-ish thing now.

Here in NYC it seems to represent something more than it inherently is.

Whimsies: Contemplating Fall.

2009-12-05T23:28:00.000-05:00

4th December 2009, playground at P.S. 2.

Whimsies: Playground.

2009-12-04T23:27:00.000-05:00

One of my favourite playground shots today. P.S. 2 playground, Manhattan's Chinatown.

Life's Lament: The Saddest Thing.

2009-12-02T23:31:00.005-05:00

Singapore Zoo. 2007.

“还记得小时候

作文簿上的志愿

那天真的幻想

如今都到哪里躲藏”

-- 我，五月天

小时候恐怕连幻想的勇气都没有。悲！

Whimsies: 為什麼。

2009-12-01T23:45:00.003-05:00

NJC Staffroom, Workroom. 2009. Reused picture (on this blog)!

沒有原因為什麼一定要有原因

有人到了七十歲還問原因

-- 亂世浮生, 五月天

Daily Musings: Words that Influence.

2009-11-30T23:25:00.004-05:00

Last day of school pictures just found! 2008.

Hi, when was it that you realise what you say has influence?

When did you start using that to your advantage?

Do you think you lost some of that 'naivety' when you thus do so?

I think it's inevitable.

Nothing bad really.

this is very much a neutral thought.

Reminiscence: Sleep.

2009-11-29T23:11:00.003-05:00

Han Dong. Possibly 2006.

I have been sleeping loads. =)

Life's Lament: Low Maintenance.

2009-11-28T00:42:00.004-05:00

Post-Thanksgiving Dinner @ Peixin's.

I am low maintenance after all.

Up at 1am to shop and only AX was opened.

Seriously shopped from 5.30am to 10.30am and all I got was basic stuff.

I walked through the whole of Macy's.

I was prepared to spend.

Nothing.

Much.

In other news, the guys here can really cook! Tim and Shuan. =)

And Bing can clean.

What a daily life entry. Who would know these people?

Talking about strangers to strangers is an activity curiously engaging?

Whimsies: This Strange Division of Labour.

2009-11-25T23:29:00.004-05:00

Not Borrowed Time but the Baker. Amy's Bread. Chelsea Market. Today.

So, this Division of Labour thing.

Strangely, one is required (probably) to have expertise in the field in order to do that repetitively simple single act within the entirety.

At least in the case of this baking enterprise.

Whimsies: No Man's an Island.

2009-11-25T00:02:00.002-05:00

Geography Trip to Kuantan June 2008.

The professor said today that 'No Man's an Island'.

To be more specific, an island totally cut off.

I guess that's true, for someone may put a statue on you or find a cave in you (your hollow heart haha) and you become an attraction.

I am a Rock (Live: 'This according to Artie [Art Garfunkel] is my most neurotic song.' - Paul Simon)

Simon & Garfunkel

A winter's day
In a deep and dark December;
I am alone,
Gazing from my window to the streets below
On a freshly fallen silent shroud of snow.
I am a rock,
I am an island.

I've built walls,
A fortress deep and mighty,
That none may penetrate.
I have no need of friendship; friendship causes pain.
It's laughter and it's loving I disdain.
I am a rock,
I am an island.

Don't talk of love,
But I've heard the words before;
It's sleeping in my memory.
I won't disturb the slumber of feelings that have died.
If I never loved I never would have cried.
I am a rock,
I am an island.

I have my books
And my poetry to protect me;
I am shielded in my armor,
Hiding in my room, safe within my womb.
I touch no one and no one touches me.
I am a rock,
I am an island.

And a rock feels no pain;
And an island never cries.

What a cute song.

Whimsies: Art on Street.

2009-11-23T22:22:00.002-05:00

22nd November 2009. Union Square.

Imagine. The artist captured by two lounging beach bums served by a henchman to create great ephemeral art on the street.

Daily Musings: 青春.

2009-11-22T19:41:00.002-05:00

Bedok. December 2008.

我好适合长大。

Slightly melancholy thought I thought and think.

Having re-watched the production 'documentary' of Mayday's last album 后青春期的诗.

Whimsies: Yellow.

2009-11-21T23:32:00.001-05:00

20th November 2009. Outside Brittany.

Reminiscence: NJC.

2009-11-20T21:27:00.002-05:00

August 2009.

Whimsies: Flight.

2009-11-19T22:42:00.004-05:00

Geography Trip 2008. Ben & Xuandao.

If flight comes with wings, I would rather not.

I dislike sleeping on my stomach.

Gen says: 'P.S. i never sleep on my stomach, it results in a miniature chest. :D' (Of Chan Biqing here)

Daily Musings: False Cause.

2009-11-18T20:22:00.001-05:00

Halloween 2009.

It's easy to believe in False Cause.

Like how the jacket keeps you warm.

Daily Musings: Intrinsically Hedonistic.

2009-11-16T21:41:00.005-05:00

Vietnam ISL. December 2007. Andre with Kids.

If you haven't already heard me say this the thousand and one times, all actions can, or at least should, be explained from a hedonistic point of view.

Every time someone makes a comment 'how sacrificial to serve the community' (I dislike this especially in the context of elections as in school council elections) I think we do things only because they are what we want to do.

Community service is leisure to me.

If you conform to societal expectations, you do it because you seek approval.

Unless you are simply foolish.

Not only do I think I am describing a Situation but that this Should be the case.

Such personal and intrinsic motivations, when acknowledged, make us dependable and consistent people of the world.

If it just so happens that what makes you happy and satisfied with yourself is helping others or in some way beneficial to others, you probably are as good a person as you can get.

Whimsies: Hair. Broadway's. Not Mine.

2009-11-15T23:13:00.003-05:00

From http://www.hairbroadway.com/about (check out the cast blog!)

'Let me not tell you a story. Let me show you a Moment. 60's Preserved.'

This is but my own commentary, not the take of the musical.

Whimsies: Learning.

2009-11-14T23:38:00.000-05:00

P.S. 2 13th November 2009.

Daily Musings: What should be said?

2009-11-12T21:58:00.004-05:00

The Thinker. When we went to the Met.

I make big deals of conversations.

Especially when I think the person who initiates the conversation expects something of me--like comfort or affirmation.

I think and attempt to react as I should (what I perceive the other party is desiring in initiating conversation) within my means (i.e. the extent I would go for the person).

But what if a person comes to me particularly because I am me and he thus expects some kind of response congruent with how I would react without a care?

So we over-think things.

Fun!

Daily Musings: Room for Error.

2009-11-11T00:06:00.003-05:00

Flurry. 10th November 2009. Central Park.

Bored of being mediocre, in fact plain lousy, at skating. Decided to challenge myself with the slowest shutter setting on my camera. My right hand (camera) versus my left (beanie).

Still, with utmost concentration, it blurred.

Always leave room for error.

Some.

Alas!

Daily Musings: Will & Agency.

2009-11-09T23:04:00.002-05:00

PSC PDC OBS LINCOLN 'WE DID IT' SHOT. July 2009.

Perhaps Will is not limitless and cannot be spread around.

I missed a blog entry yesterday.

But I went for a swim, at 8pm, using up Will for the day.

Whimsies: Books.

2009-11-08T03:05:00.002-05:00

7th November 2009. Strands. Taken by Shinq.

I contemplated fixing the publish date in order to make it a post a day.

I did not not out of any moral considerations but rather doing so would acknowledge the fact that I am slave to this project which I set out for myself... yet in not tweaking the date because that would mean 'submission' to this project shows that I am slave to it as well? Perhaps being willing to tweak the date in order to meet my own objective would in fact imply that the project is not as important and as dominant in my life such that I adhere to strict ethics.

Oh whatever.

Whimsies: Memorial for the Living.

2009-11-06T23:20:00.003-05:00

Washington Square Park. 5th November 2009.

On the sombre occasion. Remembering him who met his desired end in the library.

Memorials are for the living.

It's always a choice what we do with our lives and so I use the word 'desired' here regardless of how unpleasant the act.

Ms Ting's Goodwill!

2009-11-05T08:13:00.000-05:00

Taken sometime this year in August.

Drafted & left unposted 11th February 2008.

Today, Ms Ting showered her usually-seemingly dissapointing IP class (her POV) with Goodwill! SHE PRAISED US! HAHA! I have been anticipating this ever since last night and thus only slept at 2am (TOO EXCITED!). I just KNEW that she will compliment us on having handed up our essay mindmap thingy in a timely fashion. =) =D :) :D

I was excited the whole day! Then I realised that I COULD have studied for the H3 Econs test! As in I could have scored full marks if I had done all the compulsory readings (or almost full marks). I didn't. I will get what I deserve!

Tata.

Untitled.

2009-11-04T23:08:00.001-05:00

A Me Thing

2009-11-03T23:35:00.004-05:00

30th Oct 2009. P.S. 2.

A very 'me' thing to do:

'What steps have you taken re future directions? Are we talking about 10 20 years or next year type of future? Not mutually exclusive and symbiotic of course. - Peixin' -- the whole of an email sent out in response to a request for advice.

What a 'me' thing to do was the immediate thought after sending that off.

This post seems to defy all tags.

Almost a Lament?

(Is this even a lament and should it be?)

Daily Musings: Of Hopes & Dreams.

2009-11-02T01:39:00.002-05:00

Unrelated.

Our hopes and dreams matter.

Even if we do not dare.

With awareness, without courage, we feel the shame.

Be applauded for defying fear or living with what-if's.

Either way.

Whimsies: Halloween

2009-11-01T21:24:00.004-05:00

Halloween 2009.

It's Halloween when the Grim Reaper walks alongside the Soldier.

It's Halloween when Dipsy goes to the store to look for Pirate Apparel.

It's Halloween when suit becomes costume. It's Halloween when one would voluntarily go close to the H1N1 virus for a picture.

It's Halloween when we respond to names of our imagined and fiction selves.

It's Halloween when one does not have to tip after a picture with Mario or have to buy a ticket to take one with the panda.

It's Halloween when we celebrate not knowing why really.

My Favourite Dress Ain't No Costume.
(more epic stuff in others' albums though!)

Daily Musings: The Narrative.

2009-10-31T03:15:00.003-04:00

Smiles. Taken 30th Oct 2009 P.S. 2.

This morning (Friday), I locked myself out by forgetting to check if I had my wallet with me before leaving (my keys are in there) or rather, by wrongly assuming that I have it with me every morning when I check and hence ignored my own mental check-list despite the fact that I was very much aware of it.

I was late for my meeting at 10am because my suitemates were out and could not re-open the door for me.

I was late for my meeting because the Resource Centre (from which I can get the key) lousily only opens at 10am.

(After this it's more of how late I was rather than 'I was late' since the meeting started at 10am and the earliest possible time for me to get the key is at 10am.)

I was late for my meeting because the lady at the Resource Centre gave me the wrong key.

I was late for my meeting because I wrongly underestimated myself and thought myself to be just incompetent and thus tried futilely for 10 min to open the door with the wrong key.

I was late for my meeting because I wanted to wear a presentable outfit and hence rushed out thinking I was going to be late.

I was late for my meeting because I wanted to rush out of the house in order to get an extra copy of my report printed--to be considerate.

I was late for my meeting because I so did not want to be late.

I was late for my meeting because who sets meetings at 10am in the morning so far away?

I was late for my meeting because it's Murphy's Law that when I want to be early I would be late and hindered by reasons usually not even thinkable.

The list can go on.

All plausible narratives of the same event.

Placing responsibilities.

Not realising that regardless we set ourselves up to end up where we are right at any moment.

(In itself a narrative I live by.)

What has the picture got to do with the text?

(The answer surely is then your narrative.)

Daily Musings: How Long? A Lie. Self-Delusion?

2009-10-30T01:38:00.002-04:00

27th Oct 2009.

Having received a marked script, how long can you and will you resist turning right to the last page for a glance at the grade?

It is a lie that the process is all that matters. Alas.

Like how it is a lie that it does not matter when the shooter beside you is a series of 10's.

It is nothing bad. (And sometimes one can sincerely feel that process means just a little less than all.)

Acknowledgement of this sad fact comes after all with the understanding that the only thing in one's control then is how it is dealt with.

Deal!

(Actually the back-up post I was talking about in the last entry. In my defense, today I experienced something which is relevant to this as well!)

Nothing.

2009-10-29T00:02:00.004-04:00

NJC 2007. Odyssey (Orientation which we mostly ponned).

Horrors. Time to post today's entry.

And I have thought of nothing.

I can reuse the second back-up entry for yesterday though... would that be cheating?

I have to learn to be independent, away from back-ups and fall-backs.

I do not face horrific situations daily.

Will this picture do? (Pure luck I saw this while browsing my albums)

tata.

Daily Musings: First.

2009-10-28T01:50:00.003-04:00

27th October, 2009 9.05am or so.

Sometimes being the first brings not elation but self-doubt.

I mean(t) this in a very practical sense! Not the emo. philosophical. deep. sense. The above picture can be captioned 'Has class been cancelled?'

But yes, I did reflect upon the philosophical and deep life aspects to that statement. It goes against my way of doing things to explore those at great length here in a blog entry. Draw your own conclusions and if you reach any, may you enjoy them. =)

Daily Musings: Push. Hard. (the door)

2009-10-26T23:48:00.005-04:00

Puck Building. Taken 26th Oct, Monday. http://www.thepuckbuilding.com/ it's a landmark?

In any case, the Sociology department is located in that building. A landmark taken over by NYU... http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Puck_Building

Today I went to declare my major (one whole subway station away from Washington Sq Park!) at the Sociology department.

Upon arrival, I tried the door. Locked.

And as the doors of the downward elevator closed on me (thought of going for breakfast first), I observed a guy successfully entering the department.

Down and up again. Once more, I tried the door. Did not work. Only. I KNEW that it could be opened (the guy did it) and then I pushed just a little harder.

How do we know when it is fact that we have tried our hardest (as I initially thought I did) and that failure is definite or it is that our greatest efforts are just not good enough?

When we see that someone else has trodden on the same path and succeeded are we then more likely to forge ahead, sure of eventual success?

Alas, I would then never be a trailblazer (oh! PW! unintentional reference), going where nobody has gone. At least in the field of physically pushing my way into a space.

How contrived this blogging daily thing gets.

Picture Perfect Poster

2009-10-25T23:16:00.002-04:00

Taken today at 8th Ave Subway Station.

Does not reflect any stance on religion taken by me.

I am too lazy to think.

Daily Musings: The Minute Life

2009-10-25T00:37:00.002-04:00

23rd October, 2009. Taken from the Subway out.

Imagine the minute life.

Each minute matters.

When one lives by subway schedules.

(I have forgotten what I truly wanna say about the minute life for which I took this picture for.)

What's in an Autograph?

2009-10-22T00:23:00.005-04:00

Picture from: http://www.hamletbroadway.com/multimedia/

Watched Hamlet, starring Jude Law. I did not know (or rather have forgotten) the story of Hamlet but thought pretty accurately before the play that 'there's a ghost who was the king, and then Hamlet goes mad and everyone dies.' Just add in how people die ridiculously when they are not supposed to, we get The Duchess of Malfi really. And just vague enough to fit most other tragedies, Shakespearean or not.

Jude Law is a nice guy. He autographs every playbill and poster, regardless of how far back you stand in the crowd (as long as your arms are long enough though).

I didn't get anything autographed but stood in line (i.e. crowd) with an extremely excited friend (while her friend repelled and temporarily rejected acknowledging the friendship).

Even without a takeaway autograph, I think I got the full experience, at least the worthwhile bits.

What's in an autograph?

It's really the shoving and pushing and waiting in a crowd.

I once waited many hours in line just to get autographs of Mayday. After, the autographs were kind of abandoned in a drawer until I need to refer to lyrics (really not to look at the signatures). In fact I cannot distinguish one signature from others.

Autographs are getting increasingly cheap. Just look on Ebay.

I would rather be in the crowd and get nothing than to get an autographed poster fedex-ed to me.

Perhaps we like to be a crowd of like-minded people. Which just may serve as affirmation for our liking.

Or we like the illusion (or reality) of having that close interaction with people we like and admire.

Are our willing efforts testimony of our liking (and are justified by our liking too)?

I think some people take such fan-ish activities to be landmark events and markers of a teenage (or youth-ish) life well-led.

Oh whatever.

Go mad. At least once. It's fun. Exhilarating. No need for thinking.

Tata!

A Thought a Day. (sometimes with photos masking as thoughts)

Daily Dreams: Dragon.

Banal Life: Mua Chee.

Genevieve Says.

Daily Musings: Follow your Dreams!

Whimsies: Birthday Lecture.

Whimsies: Bacteria-Love.

Life-ish Edicts: Romance Novels.

Deathly Whimsies: Ripped by Wind.

Whimsies: Black as Moonless Night.

Daily Dreams: Graded Expedition.

Whimsies: Alice should be in Wonderland.

Daily Dreams: Thai-Korean Conflict.

Daily Musings: Anticipation.

Daily Dreams: Trojan Death.

Daily Dreams: War & Disaster.

Daily Dreams: Schools Aggregated.

Whimsies: 活。

Daily Dreams: Clay City.

Daily Dreams: A Most Treacherous Competition.

Daily Dreams: Undercover Bridesmaid.

Daily Musings: Book End.

Daily Musings: Weather.

Daily Dreams: American Gangster.

Life's Laments: Diary.

Daily Musings: Result Day.

Trivial Question: Late.

Daily Musings: Where.

Daily Musings: The Tragedy of Predictability.

Daily Musings: Doors.

Whimsies: Trodding.

Whimsies: 知足.

Whimsies: 爱新世纪.

Whimsies: 勇敢原谅.

Daily Musings: Easy.

Daily Musings: Eye Contact.

Daily Musings: Nothing else to say.

Whimsies: Hot Boy.

Daily Musings: Consistency.

Back.

Whimsies: Feeling 2010.

Whimsies: 希望的曙光！

Daily Musings: Disappointment.

Whimsies: Doughnut.

Daily Musings: Resolute 2010.

Whimsies: Eagles and Horses.

Daily Musings: 不會遺憾就OK了.

Whimsies: Pixie!

Whimsies: Point an Angel.

Whimsies: Clovers.

Daily Musings: 总会有一天.

Daily Musings: Expectations.

Whimsies: WelcoME.

Whimsies: Brand China.

Whimsies: Urban White.

Daily Musings: Helping Hand.

Whimsies: Off-white Snow

Whimsies: Pokemon.

Whimsies: Polar Bear.

Whimsies: Fiery Christmas Chill.

Banal Life: Work.

Whimsies: Rainbow Geek.

Daily Musings: Last of One's Kind?

Banal Life: 10 hours.

Whimsies: Bubble Tea.

Whimsies: Contemplating Fall.

Whimsies: Playground.

Life's Lament: The Saddest Thing.

Whimsies: 為什麼。

沒有原因﻿ 為什麼一定要有原因

有人到了七十歲還問原因

-- 亂世浮生, 五月天

Daily Musings: Words that Influence.

Reminiscence: Sleep.

Life's Lament: Low Maintenance.

Whimsies: This Strange Division of Labour.

Whimsies: No Man's an Island.

Whimsies: Art on Street.

Daily Musings: 青春.

Whimsies: Yellow.

沒有原因為什麼一定要有原因